A personal note.
It’s the last 40 days of the year and, coincidentally, the last week of my fourth decade. Putting those two facts together has stirred up some anxiety, so if you find yourself stressing about the former or also have a milestone birthday ahead, I’m doing an impromptu post with tools to hopefully help us both through this time.
40 days until 2023!
A simple change in verbiage plus a happy punctuation mark makes this reality feel a whole lot different! There’s power in words, both written and in our heads. If you’re like me trying to keep anxiety, stress, and overwhelm far far away, see if one or more of these methods helps you process what’s going on so you can feel better and move on.
Write. Let your thoughts freely flow, digitally or pen to paper. I don’t journal every day, but when I do jot down a couple of quick feelings or thoughts, a mental weight lifts. Keep forgetting things you need to get to? A good brain dump at the start of the week or month can help you offload, edit, and prioritize what’s essential from what’s not. I also do this on weekends with my girls, so we all know what’s happening and what few things we’d most like to do individually or as a family. This makes everyone feel they have a voice, which has made our time together much more pleasant even when we don’t get to all the things.
Talk. Out loud. To your partner, close relative, trusted friend, or licensed counselor. In my experience, ALL of these listeners help so much when it comes to processing stressful seasons like the holidays. Talking out loud is my personal challenge, one I’m still practicing and working on. It isn’t easy or comfortable expressing true feelings, but it’s an invaluable tool and practice for taking care of yourself.
Listen. This one can be as hard as talking out loud, especially when it’s yourself you’re trying to hear. We all have a running internal dialogue, a voice inside speaking from our rational-logical mind. We also have intuition, a knowingness or “I’m not sure why, but…” feeling that reveals itself in a quieter way. Only in the last few years have I started to sense a deep pull and I’m amazed by how much better I feel when I listen and do (or don’t) based on what I hear. It’s helped me hold my integrity and values, even if that meant awkward, uncomfortable moments. Wondering if your intuition is speaking to you? Intuition can be hard to discern from your inner voice, feelings, and emotions. Dr. Heidi Heron, PsyD, breaks it down in her Exploring Intuition video series, so if you’re curious and want to learn how to listen, check it out here.
turning 40
Of the two, I’m least anxious about this one. It’s a big number, for sure, but this birthday finally feels much more than “a number”. Forty represents that many years of growing, stumbling, trying, achieving, and feeling my way through this life I get to call mine. It’s twenty years spent acquiring knowledge and skills, plus another twenty honing them into a practice I get to share with others. Forty celebrates a unique memory of experiences and emotions that have shaped who I am and continue to influence who I’m becoming, which is the best part about reaching this milestone year…realizing there’s still MORE to come!
And the next chapters have four decades of life to hold me up with a…
…stronger sense of purpose, self, and awareness,
…learned courage and trust to turn obstacles into opportunities,
…and newfound gratitude and grace for whatever unfolds next.
I don’t know what they will or won’t hold, but 0 through 39 have taught me I have the power to make the future what I want, and I’m okay to feel and be all of me, all the way. And so do YOU.
A bit deep for a Tuesday...maybe, but my gut sense is good, so I’m sticking with it. Forty, we're going to be FABULOUS.
what's your intuition telling you?
Mine has been in overdrive, especially around the next week. I'm definitely sensing something (or someone?) is coming, so I'll have to report back and let you know if my gut was right.
For now, take care, dear friend. Take time for yourself this holiday weekend, even if it's just to re-read this post. You've got a friend in me...to write to or to hear you out. So grateful and glad you're here.
Always,
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