3 outer ways to calm inner clutter

I've always loved the clean slate September brings. This year? I'm looking to October for a fresh start.

We've got 90 days left in this year, and to date, it's personally been more mentally challenging and emotionally draining than 2020. I just can't let the hard stuff define my 2021. And I'm going to take each day left to turn it around.

Here are 3 tactics I'm implementing right now to make the rest of this year the best:

tame external triggers

When I find myself spiraling down, I instinctively fall back on organizing my surroundings to gain back a sense of control. Floors and countertops are my biggest triggers. Clearing and cleaning them up make me feel so good and ready to move forward.

Outer order really does breathe in an inner calm (@gretchenrubin), but you have to try it for yourself to feel the effects. A recent client of mine noted how much more comfortable she felt in her family/play area after we removed no longer used items and designated homes for the rest. Her nightly tidy-up goes by fast, and has given her newfound time and space to relax.

If you want to give this a go, set a timer to tidy up a small area in 10 minutes. Last week my little one asked me to set a timer. Seriously? Yes! We absolutely reset the clock a few times, but she got it done with no nagging or tears. Family WIN of the week!

accept help from friends

This one's hard for me and probably a lot of you out there. Whether you feel a natural or social pressure, it’s not always easy to ask for help let alone accept it when friends volunteer. And with the last 85 weeks (yes, I'm keeping track) spent mostly as a single family, reaching out feels even more uneasy and awkward.

Asking for help feels vulnerable, but not asking feels like a helpless struggle.

I know I’ve benefited greatly when I've said 'yes'. Accepting my neighbor's offer to watch my girls gave me uninterrupted time to focus on my website. My love knows me and my tells (how many times have I reorganized the same drawer?!), so we talk it out. Every. Day. He always asks what I need or what he can do more of, and I'm practicing letting go. If my purpose is to help others, then I need to accept help, too.

make your own FUN

Everything still feels uncertain and unpredictable, but you know what isn't? Birthdays!

I can't think of anything sweeter than celebrating a kid's birthday with a little backyard bash on a warm autumn night. String lights, glow sticks, and a fire table helped "light the night" as my birthday girl loves to say. Cupcakes, marshmallows, and hot chocolate sweetened the deal. It was unusually impromptu for me, but I think that's what made it so great. No time for drawn-out plans. Simple, quick, and a way to tap into something I've missed doing — connecting, celebrating, and relaxing with wonderful humans. A little sleep was lost, but hands down worth all the smiles, excitement, and laughter shared.